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Joke of the Day

"What's so lame about a duck President? Pieces of bread, quacking, getting into all types of duck antics in the Oval Office! I'm game!"

"What do spies say in bed? Shh I'm undercovers"

"Of all the things ""Inside Amy Schumer""... ..why can't any of them be funny?"

"Based on the amount of tools I've dated, you'd think I got a deal at The Home Depot"

"Which is the saltiest fish? Tuna"

"What is a Polish person's favorite weapon? A Warsaw..."

"Sister: Why are you putting the saddle on backward ? Brother: How do you know which way I'm going ?"

"*Financial Status* Just rinsed off a paper plate..."

"How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side."

"My 5-year-old niece's twist on an old pirate joke **Question:** Why did the pirate have trouble with the alphabet? **Answer:** Because his 'I' was all jacked up. *...she cracks me up*"