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Joke of the Day

"What I need is to find a woman who loves me for my money ... but doesn't understand maths. - Mike Birbiglia"

"A guy walks into a bar. He sees a pirate with a steering wheel in his pants. The guy asks ""Why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?"". The pirate says ""I don't know but its driving me nuts!""."

"How do you make a pheromone? Let his people go!"

"What is Mexicans favourite sport Cross-Country"

"I stole a toilet seat from a police station. They never found out who did it. They had nothing to go on."

"They say ""confidence"" is the most attractive quality in a partner. But I'd have to say, ""not banging my friends"" would be a very close 2nd"

"What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear? A wind tunnel."

"I offered my Muslim girlfriend a bite of my gorilla sandwich but she shook her head and said... ""That's haram, bae."""

"Every cab is the cash cab if you've got a gun."

"Have you heard of the Y-values? I heard they're all the range."