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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend has accused me of stalking her. Well, technically she's not my girlfriend yet."

"How do you know if you have skin cancer? You die from skin cancer and come back as a ghost to study the autopsy report."

"What's the difference between Donald Trump and an orange? One is wrinkly, sour, and orange. The other gets picked by Mexicans."

"A lady got off the train so I finished her crossword. Turns out she'd just gone to the toilet and now she's back and she hates me."

"[NSFW] Why do women have legs? Have you seen the mess snails make?"

"Why is stormtrooper always late from work? He keeps missing his train"

"One of the fake rooms at Ikea should just be a couple fighting as they try to put the furniture together"

"I watched a documentary about the victims of anorexia. Maybe I would have taken them more seriously if the camera didn't add 10 pounds."

"You wanna read a joke? My internet points"

"Why isn't North Korea democratic? Because Kim Jung Un doesn't want a public erection"