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Joke of the Day
"To the man who just got naked in public I admire your balls"
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"Would you like to hear a Helen Keller joke? So would she."
"As I suspected, someone's been removing soil from my garden. The plot thins."
"I hate looking in the mirror. Whenever I do, there is always some asshole blocking my way."
"I always wanted to be my own boss so now I run a nonprofit Not by choice, im just a shitty salesman."
"I was standing next to a guy before he was brutally stabbed. It was a near-death experience."
"A nurse goes to the bank As she is about to sign her name on the deposit slip she pulls out a rectul thermometer, ""awww crap some asshole has my pen."""
"Is there a morning after pill to erase all the texts from the night before?"
"When asked which is more important looks or brains? 9 out of 10 zombies said ""braaaaiiiiinnnnssss"" number 10 ate the researcher."
"I don't believe in ghosts. They're always lying to me."