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Joke of the Day

"Weird Al and Vin Diesel should team up with a chip tune band Then they could be Al, Vin & The Chip Monks"

"What do porn stars and prostitutes say when they wake up in the morning? Time to suck today's dick!"

"A blind judge conducted a trial.. And even after no one managed to provide a substantial incriminating evidence he still condemned the defendant. he couldn't see the truth."

"*calls wife into the bedroom* *dims the lights* *turns on Marvin Gaye* *sexily sweeps toddler's collection of trucks off the bed*"

"I knew this guy who was so dumb... he saw a road sign that said, ""Disney Land Left"", so he turned around and went home."

"How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question. Gas chambers don't have light bulbs."

"What is the most obvious caretaker? It's a parent."

"""Keith Moon was Nuts"" Another insightful nugget of trivia from Opie. Oh you means the rock drummer that put fish and explosives in his drums was ""nuts""?"

"If you weren't supposed to eat 15 Oreos in one sitting, they wouldn't package them in rows of 15."

"I once knew a guy in high school who got caught masturbating in the shower. It really ruined our class trip to Auchwitz for us."