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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a flea bitten dog and a bored visitor ? Ones going to itch and the other is itching to go !"

"I can't believe christmas is 364 days away... And people already have their decorations up."

"What would be the American version of ""Duck Quacks Don't Echo""? ""Jet Fuel Don't Melt Steel Beams""."

"All I want is for someone to pretend to love me for who I am, then gradually change me over a period of several years until we both hate me."

"Next time a job interviewer asks where you see yourself in 5 years, say ""Why TELL you when I can SHOW you?"" then just sit there for 5 years."

"What's a pirate's favorite letter? **ARRRR** *NO!* His first love be the C."

"What do you call a sleepwalking nun? A Roamin' catholic"

"I love Halloween. Its the only time I can wear my KKK outfit and get away with it."

"Year 2142: Meat eaters have died out. Vegans survive. 2143: Everyone is dead b/c the vegans couldn't tell anyone else that they were vegan."

"There's a steering wheel in my pants It's driving me nuts"