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Joke of the Day
"Why did the bubblegum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's legs."
Next Joke
"this guy was disemboweled? wel i guess u coud say *fumbles w/ shades and drops them in body* no ewww i droped my sunglases in the guts noooo"
"CIA DIRECTOR: if u take this deep undercover assignment, u will have to give up ur own name forever STUART GIGGLEDICK: not an issue, sir"
"My boss hates when I shorten his name to Dick I just get so tired of calling him David"
"What's 50 Cent's name in Zimbabwe? 400 Million Dollars."
"I always go the extra mile, which is why I was fired from Uber."
"Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out burning ducks."
"When I signed up for college they said I had to take a 'Fat Awareness' class I said that do we need 'Fat Awareness' for? They're so easy to spot."
"What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? You can't hear an enzyme. Courtesy of u/AVeryHappyCamper"
"If Kevin Bacon never said ""want some bacon with your eggs"" to a lonely chick in a bar, life just doesn't make sense anymore."