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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an alligator with a magnifying glass? An investigator."

"I got caught taking a piss in the swimming pool earlier... The lifeguard shouted so loudly that I nearly fell in!"

"Yesterday my Korean friend died... He was So Yung"

"I copied my Match.com bio from a used car website. White Good condition Reliable Cheap No evidence of rear end damage. Must See."

"""What do we want?"" ""A cure for ADHD!"" ""When do we want it?"" ""Squirrel!"""

"I had my wife on all fours last night... As she was telling me to get out from under the bed and fight like a man."

"Did you hear about the terrorist who was sent to blow up a car? Well, he burned his lips on the exhaust pipe."

"My 13 year old doesn't speak when she picks up the phone. She just listens and hangs up. I think she's going to be a hitman someday."

"It's a dangerous world out there. Two peanuts are walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was shelled."

"Why were the bakers hands brown? Because he kneeded a poo"