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Joke of the Day

"(Macbeth and lady Macbeth) ""I killed King Duncan"" Macbeth wtf!! ""You told me to!!"" I didn't think you'd do it omg lmao savage"

"You know you've been coding for too long when... System.express(feelings.tired);"

"Okay, let's get this straight. There's no way EVERYONE has the best boyfriend in the world."

"I tossed my friend Sierra a can of pop Sierra Mist"

"""Edge of Tomorrow"" is about a guy who's forced to relive the same thing over and over and over again, day after day after day. I can't relate at all."

"If you think your child is annoying, imagine what I think."

"what amusement park ride do jews not really care for? the holocuaster"

"Billion dollar idea: Make a prescription drug that gets rid of the side effects of all of the other prescription drugs."

"Q: What side of the dog has the most fur? - A: The Outside."

"9/10 Redditors are idiots I'm glad to be the 1%"