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Joke of the Day

"My sister's got hay fever, and now she has diabetes. I tried to cheer her up. You know, the usual. Flowers, chocolates"

"How did the Roman cut his hair? Caesar"

"Bee population worldwide is exploding. What a time to be a hive."

"A man had sex with a baby horse [nsfw] He was clearly into pedo-filly-a"

"What animal has the tendency to be a half-ass A mule"

"My wife walked in on me last night and shouted, ""What the hell are you doing with that ivory and gold dress?"" I said, ""It's not what it looks like!"""

"My lesbian friend asked what I wanted for my birthday... ... All I got was this stupid rolex!"

"The struggle Guy: goes to get a drink out of the fridge, can falls and hits him on the head. Friend: Dont worry man, it was a soft drink. :v"

"I slashed my Postal Delivery Driver's tires today I wanted to be sure *all* of my last minute packages had flat rate shipping."

"Why are pirates so mean? I dont know, they just arrrrrrrrr!"