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Joke of the Day

"(DARK HUMOR) Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands."

"I want to treat you like my big toe and bang you on every piece of furniture in the house."

"So how does this work now? Does General McChrystal have to give up his Foursquare ""Mayor specials"" in Kandahar?"

"What did the comedian eat on Easter? Hot cross puns."

"My first time... My first time having sex and playing football were a lot alike... When it was all said and done I was exhausted bruised and bloody... But atleast my dad came..."

"Who's the opposite of Christopher Reeve? Christopher Walken"

"These food blogs start simple. 'How to cook rice. Boil. Serve' But over time... 'How to creme brulee baba ganoush with caramel'."

"Q: What is the difference between a violist and a terrorist? A: Terrorists have sympathizers."

"How do you get Squirtle, Charmander and Pikachu onto a bus? You pokemon."

"I use head&shoulders Me: I use head&shoulders frequently Friend: But you dont have dandroof? Me: Exactly!"