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Joke of the Day

"Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee! Haha jk, we can talk. How many of the commemorative state quarters have you collected? I have 40."

"What did a tree say to another tree? Nothing, trees can't talk!"

"What do you call it when you get an erection at a funeral? Mourning wood"

"Roses are red, violets are blue. If he's busy on Christmas, the side chick is you!"

"What do you call two lesbian dinosaurs? Lickalotypus."

"Family...Friends....Fun...Fridays. All good things start with ""F""."

"My doctor told me I suffer from Anorexia... ... like it's not enough that I'm fat."

"People question the Christmas present I got for my mother They say a fridge is a terrible gift when she already has one. But when I saw here face light up upon opening it, all doubts where gone."

"Which city u cannot enter? ELECTRICITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"If there are degrees of asshole, I'm the pressing the crosswalk button even after watching you do it because maybe you did it wrong kind."