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Joke of the Day
"I feel sorry for Piers Morgan. He's basically Piers Morgan, trapped in Piers Morgan's body."
Next Joke
"I've never had anyone at hello."
"My daughter is playing ""you can't find me, Mommy""... I'm playing ""I'm not trying, Suckaaaa""."
"*looks under bed* *checks closet* *shuts light, runs to bed* *pulls covers over head* *ice maker dumps ice* *dies from cardiac arrest*"
"I live next door to a family of Anorexic Agoraphobics I bet they have some skeletons in the closet."
"Last week, my friends and I went to a topless bar... ...but we had to leave right away because it started raining."
"An apple a day keeps my fruit-picking business trapped in bankruptcy."
"So a blind man walks by a fish market... he take a deep breath, then exhales and says ""Good morning ladies!"""
"People are mad because MTV doesn't show music videos. What about Fox News? They haven't shown a fox in months. (Craig Ferguson)"
"Oh, so you don't know how bright this flashlight is? Let me enlighten you."