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Joke of the Day
"""Anyway it was lovely to meet you!"" - Translation: Off you go!"
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"2016 Election Honestly hurricane Matthew should run for president because I think he left the biggest mark on the country"
"Girl 1: ""Can I invite a few friends to your Halloween party?"" Girl 2: ""Sure. The more the scarier!"""
"Yo mama so fat... She models for the atlas"
"A son asked a his Jewish father The son asked ""Dad, could I borrow 30?"". The father turned around and answered ""10? Why do you want 5?"""
"What do you call a couch stuffed with chic peas? ... a hummus-sectional ba dum tish! I know that was bad. Please blame my boyfriend, he thought of it."
"Why did the duck leave the dancefloor? He didn't want to get down on it."
"What do you get if you cross a vampire and a circus entertainer ? Something that goes straight for the juggler !"
"let me uncover this truth son-of-a-bitch"
"its ok to feel weird in the grocery store. you are surrounded by stuff that is going to move through strangers bodies"