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Joke of the Day

"Why didn't the skeleton go for the halloween party ? He had ""No body "" to go with."

"I once dated a girl who said she was turned on by ""Black eyes"" So I punched her in the face. Turns out I heard her wrong."

"A lettuce, a tomato and a pumpkin had a race The pumpkin fell down squash. The tomato tried to ketchup, but the lettuce came out ahead"

"What do you call two lepers in a spar? Soup"

"No coffee in the pantry this morning so I had to go outside and show my dick to a cop to get the old motor running."

"It's called instant messaging for a reason. ..if I wanted to wait a week for a reply, I'd of sent a bloody letter"

"A blind man walks in to a bar... ...and a chair...and a table..."

"What did the ocean say to the river? ""You can run but you can't tide."""

"Why didn't the clam share his ipod? He was shellfish."

"Q. What does CHAOS stand for? A.The Chiefs Have Arrived On Scene."