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Joke of the Day

"IMAGINE the trash talk that goes on between Oxford & Cambridge ""I say. I heard your mum once went to Wolverhampton"" ""You take that BACK SIR"""

"Did you hear about the Vietnam veteran who became a sewage worker? He's seen some shit."

"Drank 3 shots of espresso and can now feel every part of my skin at once AMA"

"Why do you become a smurf every time you are sad? Because you're feeling blue."

"How do you know a white person is about to tell a joke? He's looking over his shoulder"

"There's a thin line between word and world."

"What do you call a bug that bothers dogs on Halloween? A trick-or-fleat!"

"I had a bowl of Cap'n Crunch cereal for the first time in a long time last weekend. The roof of my mouth should be healed in a few days."

"One pirate kicks a second pirate in the knee... The second pirate says ""Arr!! Me knee!"" (meanie)"

"I gave my family moving pictures for Christmas today. They were great gifs"