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Joke of the Day

"Let he who is without sin throw the first stone. After that we'll go by who has the birthday closest to today, then by height."

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"Things Red Bull has given me: 1) jitters 2) diarrhea 3) a heart attack Things Red Bull has not given me: 1) wings"
"A man walks into a bar. Embarrassed, he dusts himself off, then walks around it."
"I hate recursion, irony, and the Oxford Comma."
"So a baby is named by his French, Chinese, and Redditor grandparents A. L'Mao"
"I like my coffee like I like my women... Hot, dark and bitter."
"Eric Garner tried stand up comedy... But he choked on stage."
"Why should you slow down to let another car move into your lane? good karma."
"Twitter can be like talking to crazy homeless people through protective glass."
"ME: Take care of my cat while I'm away? HITMAN: [screwing on silencer] No problem."