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Joke of the Day

"Do you know what grinds my gears? I have to read the aforementioned title twice for most jokes."

"""just got my rejection letter from MENSA"" -idiots."

"Waiter what is this bug doing on my wives shoulder! I don't know - friendly thing isn't he !"

"Earth asks Mars... ""Why has Venus been so distant lately?"" Mars answers ""shes been under a lot of pressure and has really bad gas"""

"Did you hear about the proctologists collectible Corvettes? He wrecked em'."

"My brother is addicted to break fluid... But he says he can stop any time."

"Wat did the romans say when they put jesus on the cross? ""Nailed It"""

"Hi, I'm Tim Cook and I will teach you how to count in decimals * 10.1 * 10.2 * 10.3 * 10.4 * 10.5 * 10.6 * 10.7 * 10.8 * 10.9 * 10.10"

"HP Lovecraft walks into a barn... ...A horse looks at him and says, ""Why the long face?"""

"New years- the only day where its socially acceptable to drink this early"