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Joke of the Day

"Next time you kill thousands of innocent people in a disaster, tell the judge you ""work in mysterious ways"" and see how far it gets you."

"I was just scammed out of 25 dollars. I purchased a dvd titled ""Tiger Woods' favorite 18 holes."" It turned out to be about golf. Tell others so that they can avoid this scam too!!"

"Back in the day... ...cars were made in Flint and you couldn't drink the water in Mexico..."

"Nobody is as conflicted as a Jewish zombie about to eat Kevin Bacon."

"What did the french butter say when it got stocked in the cooler? Beurre... I came up with this today while grocery shopping. I'm ridiculously pleased with myself."

"""Let's save this so we can throw it away in few days"" Tupperware"

"Pravanth the Indian wife-beater punches his wife every night at 7 PM On the dot."

"What day do soldiers hate the most? March Fourth"

"Trains delayed due to: - Wrong kind of sun - Ominous cloud - Slightly damp leaf - Chilly track - Suspicious gravel - Sarcastic swan"

"Coworker *parks Prius Coworker 2 *locks bike up Me *bounces by on jumping exercise ball made of recycled tires* POSERS!"