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Joke of the Day

"How many cats can you fit in a smart car? None, you can't get any pussy in a smart car."

"A man hobbles into a McDonald's and walks up to the counter. He proceeds to place his order of 1 hot fudge sundae. The cashier asks him ""Crushed nuts?"". ""No."" He says, ""Hip replacement""."

"Why did Paul Walker cross the road? To get to the other side."

"I call my dick fun Because it's what girls just want to have!"

"How do you get a fat chick in bed? A piece of cake."

"So there was this fish that was swimming along and saw a wall. And said, dam!"

"My wife walked in on me last night and shouted, ""What the hell are you doing with that ivory and gold dress?"" I said, ""It's not what it looks like!"""

"Why did the ram run off the cliff? ...He didn't see the ewe turn! .>_<."

"What's so good about having sex with twenty one year olds? There's twenty of them."

"I just had sex with Jesus Christ I wasn't prepared for his second coming."