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Joke of the Day

"I met Michael J Fox yesterday... I was going to shake his hand but remembered it does that on its own."

"my glass eye is freaking you out? sorry I didn't real eyes."

"Best thing about drinking in downtown LA is that if u need a bathroom, it's all around you"

"""I might be a sex virgin but I'm not a virgin at AWESOME MAGIC TRICKS!"" *trips on cape, knocks over table with punchbowl & cookies*"

"Why don't cats like online shopping? They prefer a cat-alogue."

"I'd tell you the joke about the pirate But I don't think its arrrrrrpropriate."

"Where do baby soy beans come from? they come from edamames"

"[staff meeting] PRINCIPAL: ok guys, we built a room to hold our P.E. class. what should we name it? [Jim slowly raises his hand]"

"Eating spinach is much like anal sex You won't enjoy it as much as an adult if you are forced to do it as a child."

"It's colder than..."