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Joke of the Day
"If he hurts you, cry a river and then drown him in it."
Next Joke
"So, when I wear my phone clipped to my belt & a fanny pack, I'm a douche.nnBatman does it & it's a bad-ass utility belt. nnnDouble standard."
"Your Mom is like Planet 9... very distant from the sun"
"What do Russians call their barbers? Combrade"
"What do all Japanese Airmen wear eye patches? Because they're pirots!"
"Lebron's life is like one big compass... He went South, His hairline went North, his dad went East and his mom went Delonte West."
"What type of pants does Mario wear? denim denim denim"
"""Hello Mr. Ress, how have you been?"" asked the psychologist. ""I feel as though people use me as something to fall back on."" he replied. ""And why do you think that is, Matt?"""
"Why would Superman have won any race he ran against Roy Roger's dog? Because he was faster than a speeding Bullet ..."
"The world is a magical place full of people waiting to be offended by something"