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Joke of the Day

"A friend of mine is so politically correct.... At the deli he is afraid to ask for "" white American "" cheese."

"Why can't orphans play baseball? they don't know where home is"

"What's the difference between unlawful and illegal? Unlawful is against the law and illegal is a sick bird."

"What did the English man say when he walked in on his wife making love to three men? 'Ello, 'ello, 'ello!"

"If I ever get a dog I'm going to teach him how to fetch useful things like tv remotes, iPhones and men who like red wine."

"I spend 90% of my time in Texas doing u-turns under highway overpasses trying to get somewhere I can see but can't drive to for some reason."

"What's the difference between a bus station and a lobster with breast implants? One is a crusty bus station, the other is a busty crustacean"

"Naming my law firm/night club ""Mullet."" People will have to walk through the business in the front to get to the party in the back."

"I once solved a Rubik's Cube by not buying it."

"What do you call a drunk Muslim? Muhammered."