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Joke of the Day
"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the Chinese newspaper. Get it?"
Next Joke
"Shoutout to sidewalks for keeping me off the streets."
"When I woke up this morning, the garbage disposal was making a funny noise. Turns out he was just masturbating in the next room."
"If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive They would eventually find me attractive."
"lawyer talking under his breath: ""guiltypeoplesaywhat?"" suspect: what? lawyer: no further questions your honor"
"""You're sure you understand stock trading?"" ME: Yep ""Then why (holds up card) did you trade our Google shares for a Charizard?"""
"Ever turn the radio right to your favorite song as it's beginning? It almost makes up for the fact that everyone you love will die sometime."
"TIFU by buying a cheap speaker system Whoops, wrong sub"
"Q) I have ten arms, eight legs and 22 feet. what am I? A) A liar."
"What does a subatomic duck say? ""Quark!"""