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Joke of the Day

"I named my dick Rosa Parks ...Because it refuses to go in the back."

"What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A small medium at large!"

"I used to think the brain was the most important organ... Then I thought, look what's telling me that."

"Hillary's mad at Satan Hillary: Satan! We had a deal! Where's the election victory that you promised me? Satan: Where's the soul that you said you had?"

"Got kicked outta Starbucks for trying to order a venti mocha choca latta ya-ya creole lady marmalaaaaaaaaade."

"Why did the pervert cross the road? He couldn't get his dick out of the chicken."

"""Sexy role play.. I'll be a dentist."" ""I'm here for my appointment"" ""Did you book in with Karen first?"" ""No?"" ""Please leave, I'm very busy."""

"Horse trots up and says to mirror: ""why the long face?"" Mirror says ""It's okay, I'm just a bit reflective today."" I'll be here all week folks."

"I was casually playing while my teammate wrote ""I fucked your mom last night"" I replied ""no you didn't"" Then my dad ran into my room and told me that he indeed did."

"Relationship status: The pizza is late and I'm worried"