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Joke of the Day

"""Well, he's Jack Frost now lol"" -Rose from Titanic, probably"

"There are 2 types of people in the world. Those who don't fold their clothes out of the dryer... ...and women."

"A straight face and a sincere-sounding ""Huh?"" have gotten me out of more trouble than I can remember."

"Kids are like debit cards. I get yelled at when I accidentally leave them at the store."

"Did you hear about the new text-a-fart service? It's just one cent per scent sent!"

"Just so you know, I have an Epi pen... My friend gave it to me as he was dying. It seemed very important to him that I should have it."

"Due to Michael Jackson's passing..."

"My son's method of Laundry: If it's clean it's on the floor. If it's dirty then it goes on the floor over there."

"Why do elephants where pink shoes? To hide in the grass. Have you ever seen an elephant with pink shoes? No? Good hiders, aren't they?"

"I'm going to dress up as laundry next Halloween bitches love doing laundry."