29650

Joke of the Day

"What is a pedophiles favorite Italian meal? Chicken Statutory....I'm going, I'm going...sorry but this is how my brain works before I've had coffee."

"When people put pics of their vacation on FB I write: I saw fire trucks outside your house but I'm sure you already know, have a great time!"

"What do you do to an aggressive vegan? Shove your meat in their face."

"Why did the vampire feel tired after dinner? All the blood had rushed to his stomach."

"Here's a joke I've been working on: Q: What did the husband say when he returned home and found that his wife is missing?"

"The woman next to me on this rollercoaster won't stop screaming. Its like she's never seen a penis before."

"What's black and screams? Stevie Wonder answering the iron."

"Remember how in Lord of the Rings they slept out under the stars? It was pretense."

"Why can't white Tumb1r girls divide or multiply by two? Because they can't even"

"10:00pm *gets a snack* 10:01pm *turns on tv* 10:02pm *glances at twitter for 8 seconds* February"