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Joke of the Day

"As a CBT enthusiast I asked to see a dominatrix but she said she was too busy She put me on the grating list"

"I replaced the glass in my bathroom windows so the tree outside can see exactly what I do with toilet paper. You know what paper is? I yell"

"I'm just hoping Angelina Jolie hooks-up with Val Kilmer... the ""Vagelina"" headlines would be priceless!"

"Lance Armstrong interviewed before a competition - How do you feel about the upcoming Tour de France? - I'm gonna give 110%"

"2 men walk into a bar The third one ducks."

"The time for being a smartass isn't when someone is in a murderous rage. There's a discreet unmarked grave out there that'll attest to that."

"A shout out to all of the beautiful women who don't need to dress trashy to attract a man..... But party at my place for all those who do"

"I tried Tylenol for the first time today. It tasted a lot like cotton."

"What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My cock while doing it."

"A teen is telling his parents what he wants to major in ""I want to be a history major,"" he says. The dad responds, ""No you don't! There's no future in it!"""