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Joke of the Day

"I like my women like I like my tea... ...white, weak and you can't tell if what you're drinking is piss or not."

"`Why can't you get cell phone service when you're naked? Why can't you get cell phone service when you're naked? No shirt, no shoes, no service."

"I took a piano lesson with Elton John... He was so nice, he even offered to push in my stool."

"How can you tell when there's an elephant in your sandwich? When it's too heavy to lift."

"A man walks into a bar... Just kidding"

"*breaks into your house at night* *finds your bedroom* *blows on you til you wake up* HI I'M CHET CAN I INTEREST YOU IN A SECURITY SYSTEM?"

"Q: What did the blonde say about blonde jokes? A: She said they were pretty good but they might offend some Puerto Ricans."

"*handsome, young man walks up* HYM-Ms. Me-Hold it Jr. Yes, I'm sexy. But young guys aren't my thing. HYM-You've toilet paper on your heel."

"Magic Q: What does ""Magic"" stand for in Ervin ""Magic"" Johnsons' name? A: **M**y **A**ss **G**ot **I**nfected **C**oach!"

"I have a joke for you that has no punchline."