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Joke of the Day

"Why is Oedipus against profanity? He kisses his mother with that mouth"

"Rearrange the letters P-N-E-S-I to spell out an important part of human anatomy that is more useful when it is erect. Er... SPINE?"

"I put the 'fun' in 'dyslexic'."

"What did the duck say to the hooker? Put it on my bill."

"ELI101: How do people not get binary?"

"I opened a bar in the coal town of Gillette, WY. Unfortunately, I was shut down for serving miners."

"Why aren't there any Walmarts in Afganistan? Because there's a target on every corner."

"[2018] ALIEN: take me to ur leader ME: uh ok *takes him to president Donald Trump* ALIEN: lol good one but seriously where's ur real leader"

"My 40 yard dash time: 5.5 My 40 yard dash time after seeing my gf with my phone in her hands: 4.3"

"How can you tell a rabbit from a skunk? A skunk uses a cheaper deodorant!"