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Joke of the Day
"A Blind Man Walked Into A Bar... and a table."
Next Joke
"Whoever invented the ""Knock-Knock"" jokes... Should get a No-Bell prize"
"THERAPIST: what's the problem? WIFE: he replaces words with animal names just to annoy me ME: I don't do it on porpoise"
"[first day as a mechanic] ME: i would say this car is haunted"
"I met a girl with 12 nipples. Sounds funny, Dozen tit?"
"How do you give a lemon an orgasm? You tickle its citrus. (all credit to the movie *The Descent*)"
"[on a date] ""I usually don't do this but.."" *runs out on date so she has to pay*"
"What's the difference between a civilian camp and an ISIS base? I don't know I just fly the drones"
"What do you call a blonde Jew? Goldie Lox (my little sis just came up with this...or so she said)"
"""even if my client did kill his wife, think of the 7.4 billion people he DIDN'T kill."" - my first and last day as a defense attorney"