27962

Joke of the Day

"""I know she told me to buy Tampax, but I'll buy the store brand that's on sale instead."" The last thoughts of a man who's about to die."

"What do you call a male prostitute who can't stop laughing? A giggle-o"

"If I were a fly on the wall, I'd probably be the slow, uncoordinated one that makes someone feel like a ninja for killing me on first try."

"Should I buy a pizza? Heads I do, tales I ignore the coin."

"Did you hear about the Amish woman who got arrested? She was doing 2 Mennonite a night"

"someone should create huge peanuts so elephants don't have to take so long to eat and therefore have more time to reflect on being awesome"

"Lesbians favourite vegetable? Okra Edit: For the people who don't get it [Okra, also known as ladies' fingers](#s)"

"A crossfitter, a vegan, an atheist, and a Redditor who always exposes reposts are all sitting at a bar... and I know this because they won't shut up about it."

"My dog has been chasing people on bikes lately so I had to take away his bike"

"It's not that I need Anger Management, it's that others need Stupidity Management."