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Joke of the Day

"Here's to the stork that brings good babies... ""Here's to the stork that brings good babies, the crow that brings bad babies, and the swallow that brings no babies at all!"""

"I just drilled a bunch of holes It was a lot of boring work."

"M: Are you gonna eat that baby? Lady: What!!?! Go away you Sick-O' M: Sorry! I saw you putting it on Instagram & figured.. Never mind."

"Tag every baby photo you see on on Facebook as Verne Troyer."

"I saw a fight between a group of Gay guys.... Blows were exchanged."

"What kind of fish is funny, beautiful and a good role model for young women? Tuna Fey."

"I love blowing Leafs in this beautiful Fall weather. Leafs Anderson, he is a real stand up guy."

"I like my women how I like my coffee. Without a penis"

"Where does bad light go? Into a prism."

"Heaven is like arriving at Disneyland. Hell is like still being at Disneyland three weeks later."