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Joke of the Day

"A duck walks into rehab ""What're you here for?"" asks the desk lady. ""I'm addicted to quack."""

"I have this song in my head I haven't heard in years. I'm pretty sure it's called ""Don't Speak""? On second thought, there's no doubt in my mind."

"A monkey was arrested today when he started throwing flaming feces at zoo employees. Three of the zoo employees were rushed to the hospital with turd debris burns."

"Why did the elephant paint its nails red? So it could hide in the strawberry patch.... Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch? No? See, it worked!"

"My gang hand signals look a lot like the finger in the hole motion, followed by the call me gesture."

"A guy is talking with his friend Edward... ...and asks him: -What do dead and black people have in common? -Well, I don't know. -They both get a rest, Ed."

"Wana hear a Canadian joke? Toronto maple leafs."

"I like racists jokes the same way that I like black people I don't like racists jokes."

"ShittyJokeExplainBot walked into a bar. He didn't order anything. Wait for it..."

"I went to that restaurant you said I had to try. It fucking sucked."