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Joke of the Day

"I'll never forget the last thing my grandpa told me before he kicked the bucket. He said ""Watch how far I can kick this bucket!"""

"I was asked earlier today to submit a 1,000 word essay. I thought, ""fcuk that"". So I just submitted a picture instead."

"How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask which period it came from."

"angel of God: mary u shall give birth to the son of God himself & he shall be named Jesus & shall die on a cross mary: i have a boyfriend"

"What comes between Fear and Sex? Funf"

"Friends are like boobs, some are big, some are small, some are real and some are fake."

"lady: omg your puppy is so cute whats his name me: laser guardian"

"Putting the dog down today. Gonna start by telling him he has a big nose."

"What's Father Christmas called when he takes a rest while delivering presents ? Santa pause !"

"Where will you find the best jokes? Not on /r/jokes"