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Joke of the Day

"What breaks when you give it to a toddler? Their hips."

"Nice try Jehovah's witnesses, but dressing up like the police and saying you have a warrant isn't going to get me to come to the door."

"A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel sticking out of his pants the bartender asks ""doesn't that thing annoy you?"" The pirate says ""arr, it's driving me nuts"""

"What's the difference between babies and boomerangs? If you throw a boomerang correctly, it will come back..."

"Teacher: ""what does the fat cow give you?"" Student: ""Homework!"""

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Medusa Barbie ...Barbie with snakes for hair"

"Why did the guitarist get arrested? For fingering A Minor"

"What has a bottom at the top? Your legs."

"Made reservations. For the grinandbearit."

"I will never go bungee jumping. A rubber breaking was the reason I was born, it sure as hell isn't going to be the reason that I die."