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Joke of the Day

"My son would've been 4 yo today Man 1: My son would've been 4 yo today Man 2: Oh, I'm sorry man. What happened? Man 1: I pulled out."

"it must be killing england not to be able to make fun of our dumbasses because their dumbasses did brexit"

"I like my women like i like my coffee... Silent."

"My daughter just finished watching Frozen so, counting today that's 12,521,865,635,869 times since Tuesday"

"How did the Santa Lawn Ornament feel the day after Christmas? He was de-lighted."

"Why do witches go commando when riding around on their brooms? Better grip. Happy Halloween :)"

"What's Charles Dickens's middle name? Deep"

"What did the egg say at the party? Omelet"

"If you didn't get called to a meeting with your 5-yr-old son's principal because he was inviting girls to his ""naked party,"" you aren't me."

"One of my nipples is a different color from the other two. Is this normal?"