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Joke of the Day
"How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh Ten-Tickles. ... I can't stop"
Next Joke
"a culture caught between afraid of being seen as too expressive like a hipster or completely inexpressive like a basic person"
"*2 year old runs by screaming* *72 ducks chasing her* ""YOU HAVE TO LET GO OF THE BREAD."""
"Q: What goes VROOM SCREECHVROOM SCREECHVROOM SCREECH? A: A blonde going through a flashing red light."
"A man walks into a bar... He asks the barman ""do you serve women here?"" The barman replies ""no, sorry, you'll have to bring your own."""
"I love how girls say that they like a guy with a sense of humour and yet you'll never find a poster of Mr Bean on their wall."
"Is there a way to politely throw breathe mints in someone's mouth while they're talking?"
"""If I wanted to see a clown, I would have gone to the circus."" What I actually said: ""Yes, Claire, you're makeup looks lovely today!"""
"I like long walks away from everyone"
"How do you make a nun pregnant? (fixed) NSFW Dress her up as an altar boy and hope he misses."