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Joke of the Day

"I hate people who take drugs. Like customs officers."

"I had to change my GPS's voice from female to male because the female GPS told me to pull over and ask for directions."

"NSFW - If you need to voice search the web for new directions don't say it too fast"

"What's the most difficult part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair."

"Guys are always saying they get their woman to make them a sandwich right after sex. If she can walk straight after having sex, you're doing it wrong! Go make your own damn sandwich!"

"If you use yahoo search engine, A really lonely nerd in his yahoo office frantically googles your request and then posts the results"

"Why do girls never propose Because as soon as she gets on her knees, she starts unzipping him"

"Today I decided to burn a lot of calories... So I lit a fat kid on fire!!!"

"Canon to release new camera, the Canon 80D. Sadly it can't focus."

"So a chicken crosses the road and goes into a bar... ...to help his friends change a lightbulb"