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Joke of the Day

"Waiting for the day when a girl finally says that I'm ""the one,"" but isn't talking to a police officer."

"I used to be Irish... Then I became completely full of ire."

"Q: What's a cat's second favorite food? - A: Spa-catti!"

"What's the difference between a elephant and a banana?"

"Someone recently asked me, ""What blood type are you?"".. I said , ""The red runny type""."

"if you eat your burrito over a tortilla, anything that falls out will simply start building your next burrito"

"What did the Frenchman say after 80? Blaze it."

"""I Wish I Had Her Skin!"" - Teenage Girls & Serial Killers"

"Two cows are standing in a field. The first cow says, ""hey, I'm really worried about this mad cow disease going around"". The second cow says, ""I don't care, I'm a submarine!""."

"Why wasn't the pediatrician impressed with the new year's eve Times Square ball drop? Because he has seen plenty of balls drop. (Sorry)"