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Joke of the Day
"If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?"
Next Joke
"Dead scatologists never die They just go through the motions."
"Worrying is so stupid. It's like carrying an umbrella waiting for it to rain."
"Did you see the guy at Walmart hiding from ugly people?"
"The Most Dangerous Place on the Planet! Those BASTARDS!!! It's a [death trap](http://www.savagemill.com/wp-content/uploads/StoreFront_HandsOfTime.jpg)..."
"IAN: I broke my leg once ME: I've never broken a bone, touch wood [touches wood] THE UNIVERSE: THIS MAN WILL NEVER BREAK A BONE"
"If my guitar weeped, gently or otherwise, the song I'd write would be called, ""Holy Shit, My Fucking Guitar Is Weeping."""
"When is it okay to punch a midget? When he stands next to your girlfriend and says her hair smells nice."
"A fifth Fast and Furious movie? Let me suggest: Fa5t and Furiou5. That's a free one, Hollywood."
"I don't understand Christians They say that gambling is wrong, but they bet their entire life on there being a heaven."