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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a homeless man's testicle and a shot of lidocaine in the ass? One is a bum nut and the other is a numb butt"

"Two mosquitoes were buzzing round when they saw a drunken man. One said to the other ""You bite him ? I'm driving."""

"You shouldn't kiss anyone on January 1st It's only the first date."

"Hey girl, is your dad in jail? Because if I was your dad, I'd be in jail too."

"I'm should probably update everyone who wrote ""Have a great summer!"" in my high school yearbook. It was okay."

"Saw a man at the beach screaming, ""SAVE ME..I'm drowning"". I instantly uploaded his pic, captioned ""1 like = 100 prayers"" on facebook..!!"

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To see his friend Gregory Peck."

"Hey ninja turtles, if youre trying to hide that youre turtles maybe dont drive around in a van thats customized to look like a giant turtle."

"The Duke ordered his subjects not to dig tunnels beneath his land but the King gave them permission to do so, He felt undermined."

"hy haven't you ever seen any elephants hiding up trees? Because they're really, really good at it."