225557

Joke of the Day

"when the character's name is the same as the actor's name I assume it's because the actor was too stupid to respond to his character's name"

Next Joke
 
"Everyone seems so happy for you until they realize your baby carrier is just filled with mozzarella sticks."
"I met this girl at the library... She was really smart! Almost as brainy as Kurt Cobain's ceiling."
"What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he was invited to a classical musician theme Halloween party? I'll be Bach."
"Invisible Man A nurse says, ""Doctor, the invisible man is here for his three o'clock."" The doctor says, ""Well, tell him I can't see him."""
"I told my friend that I'm getting a divorce. ""What about the kids?"" he asked. I said, ""they're still together."""
"Q: How many Accountants does it take to change a light bulb? A: What sort of answer did you have in mind ? A: None-just assume it's changed."
"Why do only 20 percent of blonde chicks lay Easter eggs? The rest are hunting peckers."
"Everything men know about women [ ]"
"""Maybe connect two monocles together? Pretty good idea. I have to write this down."" - the guy that invented the pen"