225148

Joke of the Day

"Young people don't relate to George Foreman. That's why, today, I'm introducing the Skrillex Grillex."

"Why do artists die early in life? Too many strokes."

"What is the most sensitive part of a mans anatomy while he's masturbating? His ears. Oooo! I get to say it! ""Front page?! Wow! Thanks y'all!"" Oh yea, and ""RIP my inbox"" Good times!"

"""Hi?"" -First cow being milked"

"Before you criticize someone.. Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you do criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes."

"The Tomato Pastor began his sermon to the Salad Congregation ""Lettuce pray"""

"Can we PLEASE... stop beating a dead gorilla."

"What does a parent say to their boy who keeps missing the toilet? Urine trouble."

"What's the difference between matter and a hormone? You can't make matter."

"I once threw a fish off of the roof of my house. I guess you could say the bass dropped."