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Joke of the Day

"Beeped my horn at this cute guy who walked by. He shot me a dirty look. He's playing hard to get, but I've started planning the wedding!"

"Why did Dracula's mother give him cough syrup? Because Dracula was coffin. Source: A Laffy Taffy wrapper."

"*hot girl puts a cherry stem in her mouth* *twists it around with her tongue* *pulls it out* *it spells ""I LIKE YOU AS A FRIEND""*"

"I was just about to get offended by a stranger on the Internet when I remembered I'm not an idiot."

"Political Joke The Economy"

"This morning I made my coffee with an energy drink instead of water. Fifteen minutes on the highway later I realized I forgot my car in the garage."

"I've been diagnosed with a rare condition that makes me think I'm an airport building. Hope it's not terminal."

"What was David Bowie's last hit? Probably Morphine"

"a haunted house but it's just people paying bills and waiting in line at the DMV"

"First thing this morning, there was a tap on my door My plumber has a funny sense of humour"