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Joke of the Day

"How does Steve Irwin open a lock made of tears? With a ""Cry-key!"""

"What's Irish and sits out all night? Patio furniture."

"Try saying ""I like cops"" without your lips touching"

"Why don't you want to win an award for Best Feline Sphincter? Because it's a catastrophe :-) Yeah, ok, I'll be going now. EDIT: removed explanation."

"What do you call people so good at their jobs, they retire because they did everything? The mythbusters and ghostbusters."

"What is the most popular game played by tornadoes? -Catch my drift"

"I opened a company.... for guys with erectile dysfunction because I felt sorry for them. Now they all want a bloody raise."

"I fucked your mom! Shut up dad."

"Is the dog ending in Silent Hill 2 an easter egg? Or is it actually canine in the storyline?"

"Two cats cross a river... first cats name is un deux trois. The second cats name is one two three. Which cat made it across? The second cat because un deux trois cat sank."