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Joke of the Day

"How do you get an emo out of a tree? Cut the rope."

"Yo mama so old, When she farted dust came out!"

"I ordered a pizza. I don't think the guy understood how to get here. Is it free if it's 5 years late?"

"Based on the number of nurses on twitter, I now know why I'm bleeding to death in the ER."

"The trouble with unemployment is that the minute you wake up in the morning you're on the job."

"Knock knock *Who's there?* Who. *To who?* (cough, straighten collar) To WHOM..."

"Why did the chicken cross the basketball court? It heard the ref was blowing fowls."

"whats the difference between boyscouts and jews? Boyscouts come back from camp."

"Co-worker: Why did you hit me with your chair?! Me: Because my desk is too heavy."

"Chuck Norris can kick through all 6 degrees of separation, hitting anyone, anywhere, in the face, at any time."