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Joke of the Day

"Convincing someone to have sex is a lot like getting ketchup out of a glass bottle. It's a lot easier with a knife."

"There are two types of people in life... Those who think there are two types of people in life and the rest."

"A black, a Jew, and a gay enter a bar.. .. made you look"

"The best feeling in the world is realizing that you're perfectly happy without the thing you thought you needed."

"Why did Darth Maul jack off into a piece of fruit? Because the sith always comes in pears"

"What's a pirates favorite letter? You thought it would be 'R' but all pirates love the 'C'."

"Two prostitutes are talking about their clients... One of them says ""So yesterday I had this client who had a dick like my leg!"", the other replies ""Impossible - no man has a dick that's that dirty""."

"What do you get if you cross an illiterate african american with an illegal hispanic immigrant looking for a green card? A U.S soldier."

"God said come forth a receive eternal life... but John came fifth and won a toaster."

"Attributed to Mr Rogers... ...supposedly told by him to a FOAF on his first day on the job as a cameraman on Mr Rogers Neighborhood. Knock knock. Who's there? Fuck. Fuck who? No, fuck WHOM."