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Joke of the Day

"I think my phone is mentally challenged... When I try to type 'with' it always replaces it with 28th."

"A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. So who's driving? Neither! They're both research scientists gathering data on Google's driverless car. You racist"

"Some people won't stop complaining about Steam's new updates... ... I guess they just can't see the Big Picture. (Just thought of this and wanted to share.)"

"I have a light that gets sexually aroused by me. I turn him on."

"I run an amateur dramatic society. Someone approached me recently wanting to do an all dwarf version of the pantomime ""Aladdin"". The concept is a little wishy-washy."

"Why do Indians hate snow? Because it's white and settles on their land. Edit: well now I know what people mean by rip inbox. Edit2: wtf happened to my headline, why is it Donald trump?"

"A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martinus.. ""You mean a martini?"" the bartender asks. The Roman replies, ""If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!"""

"Russian nesting dolls are so full of themselves."

"My grandfather never forgave the Japanese for Pearl Harbor... ...until I explained to him that it was the Americans who made that movie."

"NO, I will not come get candy from your van, Im not craz.. Oh cookies? Hmm. Double stuff?! You don't say! The white one w/ no windows? Sure!"