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Joke of the Day

"A photon arrives at the airport As he checks in, security asks him: ""Do you not have any luggage?"" The photon replies, ""No, I'm travelling light""."

"If they sold Star Trek themed condoms they wouldn't need to put any condoms in the wrappers."

"What do you call a deer with no eyes? No ideer. What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no nose, and no ears? Still no ideer."

"Why do Russians have so many bear fighting stories? Because their liquor is strong and their women are hairy."

"I can't decide if I should get a new mattress or not. I should probably sleep on it."

"What's the difference between Russian football fans and an old drunkard in a bar at closing time? Kicking the old drunkard out won't start world war III."

"A man started to throw words beginning with 'th' at me I dodge this, then and there but I didn't see that coming - Tim Vine"

"if you meet an american who knows anything about the metric system, you have met a drug user."

"If those Amazon drones can really get to your house in 30 minutes then condoms are about to become their #1 selling item."

"Why is a vagina similar to the weather? Because when it's wet, it's time to go insiiiiide!"